Yasuki Rules of Aquisition
The Yasuki Rules of Acquisition 1.Once you have their money, you never give it back. 2.The best deal is the one that brings the most profit. 3.Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to. 4.I found it; it's mine. 5.Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity. 6.Keep your ears open. 7.Small print leads to large risk. 8.Only a fool passes up a business opportunity. 9.Opportunity plus instinct equals profit. 10.Greed is eternal. 11.Even if it's free, you can always buy it cheaper. 12.Anything worth selling is worth selling twice. 13.Anything worth doing is worth doing for money. 14.Keep your family close; keep your koku closer. 15.A deal is a deal... until a better one comes along. 16.A contract is a contract is a contract--but only between Yasuki. 17.A Yasuki without profit is no Yasuki at all. 18.Satisfaction is not guaranteed. 19.Only give money to people you know you can steal from. 20.Never place friendship before profit. 21.A wise man can hear profit in the wind. 22.Koku tarnishes, but family is forever. 23.Money can never replace dignity. 24.Koku can't buy happiness, but you can sure have a blast renting it. 25.There's always a way out. 26.As the customers go, so goes the wise profiteer. 27.There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman. 29.What's in it for me? 30.Never make fun of a Yasuki's mother. (Insult something he cares about, instead.) 31.It never hurts to suck up to the boss. 32.If it's free, take it and worry about hidden costs later. 33.Friendship is temporary; profit is forever. 34.War is good for business. 35.Peace is good for business. 36.She can touch your heart, but never your koku. 37.Profit is its own reward. 38.What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too. 39.Never confuse wisdom with luck. 40.Ambition knows no family. 41.Make your shop easy to find. 42.Never trust anyone whose kimono is nicer than your own. 43.The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. 44.Everything is worth something to somebody. 45.Gratitude can bring on generosity. 46.Reward anyone who adds to your profits so they will continue to do so. 47.Never ask when you can take. 48.Good customers are as rare as koku--treasure them. 49.There is no substitute for success. 50.Free advice is seldom cheap. 51.Keep your lies consistent. 52.Let's you and him fight. 53.The riskier the road, the greater the profit. 54.Win or lose, there's always sake. 55.Seduction will get you anything. 56.Yasuki are not responsible for the stupidity of other families. 57.Never trust your customers. 58.If it gets you profit, sell your own mother. 59.Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of koku. 60.Every once in a while declare peace. 61.It's better to swallow your pride than to lose your profit. 62.When the going gets tough, the tough change the Rules. 63.Beware of the Phoenix greed for knowledge. 64.Never forget the vanity of a Crane 65.Always remember: you can always trust a Scorpion to betray you. 66.History teaches you every action the Lion will take. 67.Take heed that you remember the Dragon thirst for enlightenment. 68.Be careful around the Unicorn, they are not of this Empire. 69.The Crab will always be too busy with the Wall to watch what you are doing. 70.The flimsier the product, the higher the price. 71.A friend is not a friend if he asks for a discount. 72.Never let the competition know what you're thinking. 73.Learn the customer's weaknesses so you can better take advantage of him. 74.A friend in need means three times the profit. 75.Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits. 76.There are many paths to profit. 77.Act without delay! The sharp knife cuts quickly. 78.Females and finances don't mix. 79.Expand or die. 80.For every Rule, there is an equal and opposite Rule (except when there's not). 81.Enough... is never enough. 82.Every man has his price. 83.Trust is the biggest liability of all. 84.If they take your first offer, you either asked too little or offered too much. 85.The only value of a collectible is what you can get somebody else to pay for it. 86.Nature decays, but koku is forever. 87.Sleep can interfere with profit. 88.Fill a desparate need with your most expensive product, then mark it up 500%. 89.Faith moves mountains... of inventory. 90.Don't trust anyone who trusts you. 91.There is no honor in poverty. 92.A warranty is valid only if they can find you. 93.Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack. 94.Treat people in your debt like family--exploit them . 95.The best contract always has a lot of fine print. 96.There's always a catch. 97.Never judge a customer by the size of his wallet. (Sometimes, good things come in small packages.) 98.Everything is for sale, even friendship. 99.Even a blind man can recognize the glow of koku. 100.You can't make a deal if you're dead. 101.Count it. 102.Stay neutral in conflict so that you can sell supplies to both sides. 103.Never trust a beneficiary. 104.Wives serve; brothers inherit. 105.Only fools pay retail. 106.There's no such thing as an unfair advantage. 107.Risk is part of the game--play it for all it's worth. 108.There's nothing wrong with charity... as long as it winds up in your pocket. 109.Necessity, n. The mother of invention. Profit is the father. 110.Trouble is Necessity’s bastard child. 111.A lie is a way to tell the truth to someone who doesn't know. 112.Sell the sizzle, not the steak. 113.Even in the worst of times, someone turns a profit. 114.Whisper your way to success. 115.Competition and fair play are mutually exclusive. 116.Blood is thicker than water, and koku is thicker than both. 117.Chances aren't what they used to be. 118.Know your enemies... but do business with them always. 119.Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit. 120.A fool and his money is the best customer. 121.Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money. 122.Hear all; trust nothing. 123.A Yasuki waits to bid until his opponents have exhausted themselves. 124.Never cheat a Lion... unless you're sure you can get away with it. 125.It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door. 126.If you're going to have to endure, make yourself comfortable. 127.The justification of profit is profit. 128.New customers are like fugu --they can be succulent, but sometimes they can kill you! 129.It takes a Yasuki to cheat a Yasuki. 130.Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than the question is an answer. 131.Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success--don't hesitate to step on them. 132.Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach. 133.Never gamble with a monk. 134.You can't free a fish from water. 135.Always know what you're buying. 136.Always know the competition. 137.Sometimes what you get free costs entirely too much. 138.Possession is 11/10 of the law. 140.Beware the man who doesn't make time for sex. 141.Koku lasts longer than lust. 142.There's a sucker born every minute; be sure you're the first to find each one. 143.You can't buy fate. 144.Never be afraid to mislabel a product. 145.More is good... all is better. 146.Sake is the lubricant of choice for a customer's stuck purse. 147.A wife is a luxury... a smart accountant, a necessity. 148.Accountants do not play the game; they only keep the score. 149.Life's not fair. How else would you turn a profit? 150.A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience. 151.A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on. 152.Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for koku. 153.The customer is always right (...until you get their cash). 154.When in doubt, lie. 155.If you believe it, they believe it. 156.In business deals, a katana can be almost as important as a abacus. 157.Never trust a hardworking employee. 158.Anything worth fighting for is worth hiding from. 159.Deep down, everyone's a Yasuki. 160.No good deed ever goes unpunished. 161.A good deed is its own reward. 162.Whenever you exploit someone, it never hurts to thanks them. (That way, it's easier to exploit them the next time.) 163.The more time they take deciding, the more money they will spend. 164.The greater (the) amount you are taking from someone, the greater the distraction must be. 165.A bargain usually isn't. 166.One person's secret is another person's opportunity. 167.The hand that holds the koku may also hide a dagger. 168.You can tell a great deal about a man from his shoes. 169.Time's an asset. 170.Your goods are now my goods. 171.Exploitation begins at home. 172.When you see a good deal, jump on it. 173.A Yasuki without a head for business has no future. 174.Business is business, even among friends. 175.Everything has a price. 176.Ears open, eyes wide. 177.Never believe anyone taller than you. 178.There's a Rule of Acquisition to cover everything, but that doesn't mean one's always got to be applied. 179.It's better to live on one's feet than to die on one's knees. **.When no appropriate Rule applies, make one up. (The unwritten rule)